Mimi, NI Studios, November 2020
Mono-print on cartridge paper, A2 sized
'I love you so much (it makes me sick)' is another in my ever-growing collection of autobiographical monoprints.
It's a commentary (there seems to be a theme here) in to my relationships and the role that I play within them.
I know that I'm not alone in the push and pull of 'I love you'/'go away' dynamic that has seemed to rule my relationships for a majority of my life. It can get very lonely, and almost frantic trying to navigate your way through your own emotions.
I think what I love most about mono-printing is that it's so quick in fruition; you don't really have the time to plan out everything and it doesn't need to be perfect to make an impact.
It's my handwriting, and my subject matters are autobiographical; making it innately and essentially a part of myself on the paper.
I think, speaking candidly, nobody is born expressing their emotions in this way. As I have matured and grown more, I recognise myself giving as much away as I can to the people in my life to hold them near, until it turns in to a vicious cycle of me giving everything and receiving nothing in return.
I am left empty.
"I love you so much it makes me sick" is me screaming at the top of my lungs, that I love you, you idiots. And I always will.
Please give it back to me in abundance, because I can't be the only reason our relationships are strong.